This security thing sef

16 09 2013

Been a very eventful period in my life. There is certainly something about 9ja that brings out the ‘philosopher’ in me and so I have been doing a lot of thinking and as terrible as I am with Facebook, twitter, Instagram, Skype, that mobile thingy [Wattsapp I tink], when I finally decide to join the 21st century, I find me self locked outside.

With the terrible internet services provided at home that leave much to be desired, I often find my self a stranger to my accounts through a very vicious cycle which is frustrating yet simple. Often it involves me not having internet in like forever then being unable to log in because I can’t for the life of me remember all of my passwords.

It truly is laughable when things that ought to keep you safe turn around in a weird way and prevent you from enjoying life and its benefits.
It is the same thing with emotional walls that we build to protect us. Sometimes, these walls can become so many and so secure that we miss out on life. Make that the abundant life Jesus died to give us.


Belated New Year’s wishes :)

3 05 2013

Dear Blog,

Can’t believe that this is my first entry of the year but then who is judging? So far this has an amazingly emotional year. So far,I am grateful for 

  • the soft fluttering of butterflies in me stomach when he looks at me or says something that makes me smile [surprising myself these days]
  • walking  through an uncharted path on the  well-trodden road of decision-making  which brings with it a certain level of vulnerability, which I totally dislike
  • Greater sense of me position thru the Resurrection

All in all, a fabulous year so far with greater things yet to come


So who’s this ‘Zaga?’

12 12 2012

Many rain seasons back [this is an old story and as such, I need to go back to the time clocks had not yet been conceived], more like in 2008, I was introduced to the person called ‘Zaga’ by my brother.

Most Nigerians had been singing a song all the time, everywhere. In this particular song, ‘Zaga’ was always mentioned. Intrigued, one of my brother’s  friends [let the unknown person be X in this story]; X, was intrigued and he asked my brother who ‘Zaga’ was. You see in that song, ‘Zaga’ was talked about a lot and  was called very great. The fact that almost everyone was singing about ‘Zaga’ convinced X that ‘Zaga’ was truly off the charts and totally powerful. So he came to my brother and asked him ‘Who is Zaga? Tell me about ‘Zaga’.

My brother[at that point was befuddled because he had never heard of ‘Zaga’.My brother prides himself on being knowledgeable about national and  world events, so I can’t begin to imagine what he must have thought about the possibility of such a person existing and he not knowing about him]    assured X that there was no influential  Nigerian king or president called ‘Zaga’. Finally, X sang the song in question to help clear the ‘webs of forgetfulness’ that had so far allowed my brother to forget the great ‘Zaga’.

The totally cool version of the song had been re-mixed by X and his lyrics went this way; ‘how great is Zaga! Sing with me how great is Zaga! All will see how great, how great is Zaga!’

To cut a long story short [my brother’s amused laughter included], X was assured that ‘Zaga’ was truly a great and influential King.Whether my brother revealed ‘Zaga’s’ true identity  I am not sure  at this moment. He shall be queried……

Just listened to Darlene sing ‘How great is our God’ and the whole ‘Zaga’ thing came back to me. I truly mean it when I sing ‘how great is’ Zaga!’  Sorry, that should have been ‘how great is our God!’


how far is too far?

10 11 2012

I am feeling slightly like a genius this evening….the load of papers I have had to read over the past week are definite contributors to this feeling. Hopefully this post will make better sense than the one before it.  If my memory serves me correctly [that is if the spaghetti I just had isn’t playing tricks on me], I messed that up….but who is marking??

Anyways, between putting the last effort into my thesis [which basically consists of  the vicious cycle of feeling crappy when awake and feeling guilty for sleeping], my flat has become the stage for a mini soap. To cut a long story short, safety measures before taking a shower these days include testing the drain to make sure no one’s hair is clogging it….seriously though, if you fail to take this precautionary measure, be rest assured that you will bath in a pool of your bodily dirt. If that grossed you out, I kinda apologise….I’m only setting the scene for me story.

Anyways, on Sunday the 3rd of Novemeber, some flat members said enough is enough and put up this nice warning on the door to the bathroom. By that evening, it had led to the formation of a roaster for throwing out the garbage. My role in this drama is not to be divulged….for reasons best known to me. By Thursday afternoon, there was this little addition to the not on the bathroom door asking people not to brush their hair in the kitchen. My faltmate and I shared a laugh about that and I kinda forgot about it till this evening while heating my breakfast/lunch/ dinner up.

I had this insane urge to go and add my own footnote to the notice on the door. Since I’m all cool and scientific, mine will have everything to do with germ control. It will read ‘please do not breathe in the common area of the flat’. This is highly important because winter is coming and the flu virus travels by air…worrying about the issue of a dirty pool is no public health concern because I believe no one in my flat has any injury.

Anyways, mine will either be that or ‘please, no sneezing in the kitchen’. Truthfully though, brushing your hair in the kitchen is kinda weird …but then tolerance on some level is called for. If everyone wrote their pet peeve on the door leading to the bathroom, not only will tempers flare and weaves scatter, but I for one will take up a new job as the flat judge.

like a rushing wind

25 09 2012

With the windy situation in town and me witnessing the most ferocious ‘wind tantrum’  for me, this song took on a whole new personal meaning. At a point I really thought I was going to get swept away by the wind… in the cartoons where the character whirls and whirls. Thank God my imagination did not become reality. It would make a totally embarrassing trend topic on yahoo and attract maybe a zillion views on Youtube {there goes my imagination again}. O when You do come in taking control like  rushing wind, sin, debris and all things not established by you really do not stand a chance of survival. Like a rushing wind, breathe within

the guy the sniper caught

11 09 2012

I love action movies. Those types where the stars are strong, kick ass and never die. Films like the transporter, the James Bond series and old school movies like Eraser.  I totally love the Jason Bourne series  and Matt Damon does an awesome job portraying Jason. Even though I am not really supposed to, I decided to take a break and watch the Bourne ultimatum. I love the part where Bourne and the Guardian reporter are at the station and Bourne just deals with all the people that are trying to kill the crazy reporter. It is not like the action is very awesome in that part, what trips me is the way the reporter and Bourne confuse the security agents as the reporter follows Bourne’s instructions. What gets me every time is that in spite of everything, the reporter still gets killed. Jason tells the guy to stay right where he is because something is not right. He knows something is not right because this is His area and he trusts what his guts are telling him.

Sadly, all his words fall on deaf ears. I could never liken anyone to God, but watching that part again just taught me something. Many times, God says like Jason said to the reporter ‘wait, hold-on, trust Me, follow  My leading and instructions, just be at peace even when you think the enemy is breaking the door down. I got you.’ I find myself acting as dumbly as the reporter did sometimes when there seems to be an open path before me . The coast seems clear and I know that if I run fast enough, I will make it to my safe haven. Running, walking,anything is better than just waiting and listening to my mind play games with me. Why then does God want me to wait or as the Bible says sometimes, why does God want me to be still?

The few ( am I being truly honest here?) times I chose not to be still and decided to make decisions on what I could see, had results that were beyond bad. Some of them, I still am trying to get over to this day. The enemy like a sniper is out there just waiting for God’s kids to step out of the hedge and out of God’s cover so he can shoot them down.

But dear God, I thank You for your tender loving mercies that fail not. Even when I have stepped  out of the hedge and done amazingly dumb things, Your mercy prevails. Lord, I know it is not in Your character to do so, but a girl can try, Could you please help me stay within the hedge and not break out running when fear is screaming louder than the sea waves and drowning out the gentle whisper of Your love? Help me remember that You know what You are doing and that You are infinitely  cooler than Bourne,  Chuck Norris and all the action stars]combined. You know everything and have all power and no one has ever been lost by You cos You are the good Shepherd and You are good just like that.

Help me to be at rest Oh Lord, trusting in You.amen

Note to self

31 08 2012

‘No mater how tall you are, if you are not taller than your dad, then you are short’…..I can’t remember the number of times I heard this growing up. At first, I thought it meant you know being tall in metres or feet[depending on the unit of your choice]. Did I try to achieve this? As I got closer to the end of my adolescent years, I remember eating a lot of proteins so I could get to be tall. Never mind that by that time I had realised that the focus was on what I made of myself, I just wanted to be tall. Now that I think about it as I type, that may just have been the beginning of my obsession with trying to marry a tall guy. I need to explore that thought; maybe see some counsellor to help me psychologically.

Anyways, this truth was driven home again/ reminded to me by my Dad’s friend who told me this in a recent message. As I mulled over it,  it hit me that each successive generation ought to do better than the preceding one. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I became as a new fire was lit in me ( to make meself feel better, I will say, an old dying flame was fanned back to life) as I realised that I  owe it not just to my peeps back home to do great things and overcome obstacles, I also owe it to myself to aim higher and not to re-introduce in my life, obstacles that those before me have surmounted.

This is a wake-up call…..this is a note to myself.

So help me God[to do my part].

Again, thanks Sir for the reminder.